You can fool all of the people some of the time, or some of the people all of the time but there is no escaping yourself.
One thing you repeatedly spoke about was an appreciation that I didn’t judge you; I didn’t know you were hiding essential behavioral information that should have been judged.
Realizing what you’ve done prompted remembrance of things that should have served as warning signs. Even though hindsight is 20/20 it serves up valuable lessons going forward. I should have been judging your character. Your attitude about many things were entirely selfish, I chocked them up to an abnormal little quirk – a selfish streak to be overlooked because there was something deep inside to be treasured – there had to be, I thought. Our friendship was in my mind only, it was my mistake alone. I kept foolishly giving you the benefit of the doubt.
If I paid more attention, I would have concluded your allegiance with others was as transitory as your perfidious lust. Knowing you are a serial cheater would have been great information to have. I would have readily known the proportionate level of trust to supply. Obviously tis was a closely guarded secret for those in the know. But again, I had warning signs.
You’ve mocked your marriage with multiple affairs and furthermore, mired your other relationships in the process. Friends and family were caught in the middle, subjected to careful construction of the one-sided “I deserve better” version, lulling them into advocacy. Perpetually looking for them to say you deserve better – as some sort of permission to cheat. After unfolding the untold portion of this story (until now), I’d like to say – of course you have a bad marriage – it’s bad because you’ve desecrated the union, over and over. It’s a miracle you still have any semblance of a marriage? If that wasn’t enough, you’ve aided your extramarital accomplices in desecrating their marriages,
devastating not only yours, but their families too.
As it works out, sometimes stupidity is appreciated, because good things can come from insipid behavior.
This is one of those times.
What you gave birth to in your twisted attempt to throw me under the bus with your esteemed network, was a wealth of information that begot understanding. Whatever distorted danger you manufactured as a warning about me, it was issued to protect your latest depraved affair and prevent me from discovering the truth. This provided me with an undeniable clarity to the group and those players’ immoral character. Your iniquity outed theirs.
They rallied the troops to protect their well-connected member and their agenda – against me, they engaged in games of sabotage and manipulation. Oh the wicked web, and so many claim to be Christian. Most of them, including you are “Christian” in name only, pretending to be upstanding citizens that care about their community. The group also betrayed one of their own, a longtime community member and were themselves, considered a “friend”. Yes, there’s plenty of shame to go around.
Most of my earlier posts were about unraveling the truth, writing about things while still on a course of learning the “why” behind the way I was treated. If you’ve read some of those posts and felt something was missing – this is the reason, it was given by somebody I considered a friend.
I imagine a couple of my opponents weren’t quite as devious, they could have been
unwitting cohorts that jumped into the fight to criticize me without even knowing the reason.
Nevertheless, it probably goes without saying I no longer consider you a friend, but thanks for shedding some light. Not only about you, but on others I might have made the same mistake with. I do value the lesson and appreciate the opportunity to re-evaluate the
method and importance of choosing “friends”.